flashthoughts

ANGELS AMONG US

Posted on: November 21, 2014

ANGELS AMONG USTHE STORY OF MY FIRST AFA WOMEN’S RETREAT – PART I
(Also, my FIRST experience at sharing a blog in more than one post – LOL)

Months ago it was announced in church that it was time to sign up for the Women’s Retreat, which would take place in November. This is not something I was interested in as it is way out of my ‘comfort zone’. I never signed up because I had no intention of going – no intention at all!

And then I received a message on Facebook. It simply said: “You need to go on the women’s retreat Nov. 7/8”. That was it – not, “We’d love to have you join us…” or “Would you consider….”, just direct, blount and to the point. At first I thought, “Really? So sorry, but, not happening!” Let me explain all the objections I had for not going.

First of all, my husband is an Assistant Chaplain at Holman Prison through the We Care Program, which is much like being a missionary in that he has to raise his own support to be able to do what God has called him to do. Lately his support has been a little less than normal so we are trying to be very careful with what God supplies and I knew I didn’t need to spend money on a “frivolous” Women’s Retreat.

Second, being in large groups is not my idea of fun. It’s too much like high school all over again – “No one will want me there. I won’t fit in. I’ll get my hopes up that I’ll have fun and then be very let down and disappointed when I wind up with no one to talk to.” It’s just easier to stay to myself and not go through the hurt of rejection yet again. 

Third, this is not even my church. This is my husband’s church. It is where he was going when we married and I started attending there with him after our marriage. In fact, it was very hard for me to go there at first because of some things that happened in the past and because I already felt like “that’s the church where people go that dress fancy (nice) and have money and they really don’t want someone like me there.” Please know I am being brutally honest about how I FELT. I am by no means saying it was right, just being honest about my feelings. I know I spent some mornings in the bathroom crying my heart out because I didn’t want to be there. I knew there was a reason God wanted me there (besides the fact my husband was there) but I was behaving like a spoiled brat because I wanted to be where I knew people and where I knew those people loved and cared about me and we HUG when we greet each other to show our love for one another! 

Fourth, because of something that happened very recently, I had a very personal reason I did not want to go on this retreat. I am not at liberty to say any more than that. 

So, without going into all those objections, I simply replied to the Facebook message explaining that I would not be able to attend because we were trying to be very careful with our money. I also said I appreciated the personal invitation, but I would have to pass this time. To which this person replied, “Just let me know if you would like to go and I will get you sponsored. Love ya!” Seriously??? “Okay, God”, I said, “if this is You, I guess I won’t really have a choice.” I replied, saying I would see if I could get that Friday off and, if I could and someone was covering the cost, then I would go, IF there would be someone willing to room with me, which I seriously doubted – LOL 

Yes, I got that Friday off and yes, the cost was covered and yes, they had someone that would room with me. Another late comer and someone I did not know – but then there aren’t that many I would know, anyway.

Stay tuned for Part II to see how God took care of ALL my objections and find out what happened at the retreat 🙂

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