flashthoughts

UPDATE TO MY STORY

crutches

Do you use a crutch? Or two? For years, I did. I had a huge one I used – until yesterday. Now, it is gone FOREVER!!!!!

FREEDOM!!!!! VICTORY!!!!! GLORIOUS VICTORY!!!!!!! YES! THAT is what happened to me yesterday, Sunday, October 2, 2016, during worship service at church!!!! We began singing a song I didn’t recognize at first. To be honest, I was having trouble “getting into it” because I couldn’t seem to quite catch on to the “flow” of it – but that’s when it happened! All of a sudden, I started hearing the words of the song – REALLY HEARING them – deep down in my soul!!!! God did a work, through that song, in ME!!!

Before I share the song or what happened, though, I need to back up to last week’s Sunday night prayer service. (For those who don’t know, we have been having prayer services at our church on Sunday nights since July 3rd of this year and amazing things have been happening.) Actually, I need to back up a little further than last Sunday night – back to Monday night, September 12th. That is when we  (the ladies) began our Bible Study, Priscilla Shirer’s “Armor of God”. If you haven’t done this one, I highly recommend it. We are just finishing up Week 3 and getting ready to start Week 4 and I know this study on using prayer to activate my armor has played a major role in what happened to me yesterday morning. Okay, back to last Sunday night. Once again, I had found myself battling the enemy’s lies “nobody wants you around, you aren’t worth anything anyway”!! Why? WHY does he keep doing this to me?? WHY am I still battling this??? The Pastor’s wife was praying specifically with women who were battling things such as low self-esteem, feeling rejected, feeling unworthy, etc., so I went and got in line for prayer. When it came my turn, I told her why I was there – that I found myself battling these same lies AGAIN and I was tired of it! I wanted this battle OVER!!!! So, she prayed over me annnnnd…… I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. That, my friend, is why you can not go on feelings when it comes to God and what HE is doing in you.

So, getting caught up to yesterday morning. There I was, just trying to figure out this song and WHY I wasn’t “getting it” – as far as the melody and the timing, etc (these are things I don’t normally struggle with) – and then He began showing me the WORDS!!! As I allowed the words to seep down deep into my soul, I knew He was doing a work! I didn’t exactly feel anything – didn’t feel any different; yet, at the same time, I knew something was, indeed, different! I wrote down some of the words from the song, so I could look it up later, and then joined back in singing and the rest of the service. When I arrived home from church, we got busy getting lunch ready. After lunch, I was so tired, I decided to lay down and take a little nap. I never did get around to looking for the song.

At church last night, the Pastor’s wife was praying for women again – for ANY reason – and I wanted to share with her what had happened to me yesterday morning, but I didn’t want to “tie up the line” with just a praise report – something I could share with her later. However, I couldn’t seem to quit watching her line and when there was only one person left for her to pray with, I knew I needed to go share, so I walked over to wait my turn.

I shared with her what had happened and I remember saying to her, “I don’t know if this means I’m totally free or if I will still struggle from time to time with it; but, I know something is different!” I also remember something she shared with me. She said something along these lines – I don’t remember her exact words, so I don’t want to use quotes, but this is as close as I can remember – ‘When we look to others for acceptance, it is like a slap in the face to God because He is the One Who loves us and He is the One we should look to for acceptance.’ Once we accept His Son as our Savior, God accepts us – just as we are – but He loves us too much to let us stay the way we are. He will constantly be shaping and molding us, as much as we allow Him to shape and mold us.

After church, I came home and saw what my husband had posted on Facebook while I was at church (he was sick and didn’t get to attend last night). It was yet another confirmation of my COMPLETE VICTORY over this matter and I knew, immediately upon reading it, what I had said to the Pastor’s wife was absolutely one last, feeble attempt of the enemy to try to keep me from realizing I now have COMPLETE VICTORY in this matter!!!! I will NO LONGER USE MY CRUTCH!!!! IT IS GONE FOREVER!!!!! What was my crutch? Fear of rejection, in a nutshell. It comes with much other ‘baggage’ but it can all be summed up in those three words – fear of rejection. NO MORE!!! THE BATTLE IS OVER!!!! VICTORY IS MINE!!!! Does that mean the enemy won’t try to whisper those lies to me anymore?ESPECIALLY over the next few days or weeks when my victory is so new? I don’t know; but, I DO KNOW THIS: those lies won’t wash with me anymore! As soon as I hear one, I will take it to the throne and it WILL have to answer to my Father and that will be the end of that!!!

I realize now, in looking back, that I got so comfortable using that crutch, I didn’t realize I haven’t needed it for quite some time!!! I believe I was using it to keep from moving forward, because what if I tried something and failed? I realize, now, by not trying, I was still failing. I was failing my Heavenly Father and myself! I was refusing to accept the work He wanted to do in me.

Do you have a crutch you are using? Trust me when I tell you, God will be happy to take it from you; but, you have to be willing to give it to Him. He will not take it on His own. He is waiting for you to see it and realize you don’t need it anymore. As soon as you do and you lift it up to Him, He will take it away forever!

Here is what my husband had shared on Facebook. It is from Day 1 of a devotional on the You Version app called “Destroying the Spirit of Rejection:

Oct 2 at 7:12 pm
We have all been rejected in one way or another. In order to stop rejection from destroying our lives, we must be able to identify the causes of rejection and come against the demons of rejection, fear of rejection, self-rejection, hereditary rejection, roots of rejection and the spirits that come in with rejection: hurt, anger, bitterness, rage, pride, fear, rebellion and more. All of these things can torment your life.

Jesus does not want you to be tormented. He wants you to be set free. You are not alone. So many people need deliverance from these demons of rejection. God wants to set us all free from the spirit of rejection so that we can bring deliverance to our families, friends and those around us.

The Bible says, “If the Son sets you free, you shall be free indeed.” Through Christ we have been set free from every demonic hindrance and attack. The Bible teaches us how to claim freedom from rejection and move into a life of acceptance in the Beloved. Let’s look at how we can be set free by the truth in God’s Word.

And here is the song we sang at church yesterday morning – I am sharing a link to the You Tube video (Click on the song title) and, below the link, I will post the words.

P.S. The enemy also knows I am free of his lies on this subject now, because he has been fighting me all morning through my printer. I plan to print out the words to this song and put them up all throughout our house as a reminder to me. Doing this will help get it deeper and deeper into my soul and my spirit and it will make me stronger and stronger. I haven’t been able to print them yet, though, because my printer driver is wanting to mess up – imagine that! No worries, I will be praying over this printer when I finish here and then it will work again.

NO LONGER SLAVES

You unravel me with a melody
You surround me with a song
Of deliverance from my enemies
Til ALL MY FEARS ARE GONE!!!

I’M NO LONGER A SLAVE TO FEAR
I AM A CHILD OF GOD
I’M NO LONGER A SLAVE TO FEAR
I AM A CHILD OF GOD

From my Mother’s womb
You have chosen ME
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again
Into Your family
YOUR blood flows through my veins!

I’M NO LONGER A SLAVE TO FEAR
I AM A CHILD OF GOD
I’M NO LONGER A SLAVE TO FEAR
I AM A CHILD OF GOD

Oh – oh – oh, oh, oh
Oh – oh – oh, oh, oh
Oh – oh – oh, oh, oh
Oh – oh – oh, oh, oh

You split the sea so I could walk right through it
My fears were drowned in perfect love
You rescued me so I could stand and sing
I AM A CHILD OF GOD!

You split the sea so I could walk right through it
My fears were drowned in perfect love
You rescued me so I could stand and sing
I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
I AM A CHILD OF GOD!

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